When you’re going through something unpleasant, what do you do? Come on, everyone has their thing. How do you choose to escape the occasional blight that is hauled in your direction? Some people choose to drown their sorrows with wine bottles. Others turn to women, or men. A good movie or TV show can be a great pause from reality. A run can do wondrous things for the mind, bringing you back to a much better place than where you once started. Meditation is difficult, but some people can do it for hours, or weeks at a time, sometimes in complete silence. One of my best friends went to India a few years ago and did just that. But she couldn’t stay quiet. “Does talking to yourself count?” she asked me before she left. She ditched the place early.

Me? I choose to cook. While listening to music. For some reason, the monotony of chopping does wonders for my soul, especially when I’m trying to work myself out of a bind. Creating tiny little pieces out of bigger ones with a good, razor sharp knife sounds simple, but it can actually be a spiritual act. It makes me feel closer to the earth. Throwing these chopped items into a pan with screaming hot oil is transcendent. The repeated actions of stirring the food, hearing it sizzle, and smelling the aroma is what I need sometimes. Especially on this particular day, where I had to write a thirteen page essay that required ample research and thought. It was assigned a mere five days prior to its due date. I cringed. Kale & spaghetti, will you be my ticket out reality, please?

And that’s what this dish did for me. With eyes that had been glued to a computer screen for far longer than they were meant for, and fingers that had been typing at a rapid speed for hours, I took myself into the kitchen and got to work. I chopped then braised kale with lemon, onions, and garlic, cooked spaghetti and then mixed them together. The dish was simple, satisfying, and required just the necessary amount of choppage for my mind. It was bright with flavor. The al-dente spaghetti was a perfect compliment to the chewy texture of the kale. And it was healthy. It provided me with what I needed, body and soul. Then I retreated back into my den of slavery to books and finished what I had to do.

When times get tough, know that there are (healthy) ways out. Just be able to identify what you need and what’s best for you at that moment. Sometimes you just need the strength to leave for a little bit, in order to come right back in the appropriate mindset to be in your best form..

Spaghetti with lemony braised kale

Adapted from Bon Appetit

Serves 4

Notes: have you not had kale before? let this be the recipe that makes you love it. Think of it as a thicker, denser version of spinach. It’s also super high in calcium.

I kept this vegan so I didn’t add the cheese, but I encourage you to do so.

1 pound lacinato kale (about 2 bunches), large center ribs and stems removed, cut crosswise into 1/2-inch slices

3 tablespoons olive oil, divided

1 medium onion, finely chopped

8 large garlic cloves, minced

1/2 pound spaghetti

Zest and juice of one lemon

Finely grated Parmesan cheese, for serving

Red pepper flakes, for serving

Rinse kale. Drain; transfer to bowl with some water still clinging.

In a heavy large pot over medium heat, heat 2 tablespoons of the olive oil. Add chopped onion and cook until soft and translucent, stirring occasionally, about 6 minutes. Add sliced garlic and sprinkle with salt; cook until onion is golden brown, stirring occasionally, about 5 minutes. Add kale and remaining 1 tablespoon olive oil and toss until wilted, about 3 minutes. Cover pot and reduce heat to medium-low. Continue cooking until kale is very tender, stirring occasionally and adding water little by little if it gets too dry, about 20 minutes.

Meanwhile, in a medium pot of boiling salted water cook spaghetti until tender but still firm to bite, stirring occasionally. Drain, reserving 1/4 cup cooking liquid. Add cooked spaghetti to kale mixture in pot. Add lemon zest and juice and 2 tablespoons reserved cooking liquid; toss to combine, adding more liquid by tablespoonfuls if dry. Sprinkle spaghetti with grated Parmesan cheese and red pepper flakes, if using, and serve.